2011 - I lay in my hospital bed unable to move a muscle from multiple injuries, the worst being a left leg amputation. Across the room, placed on a shelf by my son-in-law, a plaque reading Isaiah 40:31,“Those who wait upon the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary.” I tried to focus on those words through constant sedation. I thought about God's promise to never harm me, but to prosper me (Jeremiah 29:11). I could not reconcile the dichotomy. My husband was dead, I might never walk again much less soar like an eagle. The life I thought God had blessed me with for loving Him, keeping His commands, serving His church, loving him, and sharing His grace vanished in an instant. I was learning new facets of the character of God and I didn't like it!
BUT... the love of Christ through His people was ever present. Beyond thousands of prayer warriors, the sacrificial out pouring of time, money, meals, house cleaning, grocery buying to help my family help me, and the countless bedside hours over the months; how could I vocalize my disappointment in the God I thought I knew?
Everyone said how strong I was and such an inspiration. What else could I do but give God the glory.
I will not write this today and say I am grateful for my ongoing trial. BUT, I can say God is in charge and He knows best. He has blessed me a thousand times over every day even when the blessings come alongside struggle. I find His mercies in the small things when I remember that He owes me NOTHING. When I get mad at God He reminds me of all he has suffered to forgive me and I am set straight. It is a continual healing. Sometimes a new wound appears or a scab gets knocked off or everything is smooth and beautiful for a while. It is called a relationship.
"For surely I know the plans I have for you, says theLord, plans for your welfare and not for harm, to give you a future with hope." - Jeremiah 29:11NRSV
Reflection Question: How do you give God glory in all things of life?
Prayer: Holy God,For the ups and the downs, the joys and suffering, help us to glorify you in everything. Amen.
Posted on Mon, March 14, 2016
by Micah James